Margs (now almost four) would NOT stop farting the other evening when I was hanging out with her. Massive, noisy, lethal farts (the kind you can taste… in your mouth… long after the gas has been released…) I finally told her she needed to go to the bathroom. After a minute she comes back out.
Me: Did you poop?
Me: You didn’t?
Margs: No! There’s nothing in my butt!
Keef: I’m sorry I forgot the iPad on the roof of the car…
Me: Its ok, you do that shit ‘cuz of your ADHD, and you put up with my crazy, so I put up with yours.
Keef: Mine’s better.
Me: But I will make a disclaimer, which is that if you ever do that to any babies we might have someday I will not be so understanding….
Keef: (pause) Yeah I could totally see myself doing that…. Which is why our baby will be wearing a helmet at all times!
Jes-Jes: Does it look smokey in here?
Me: Meh, the windshield is too dirty to notice.
Jes-Jes: That’s a win.
You know you’re a stoner girl when you pull a bobby-pin out of your hair to use to cash a bowl.
Whenever Lazlo goes to the bathroom he likes to be as far away from his mess as possible. This usually means putting three of his four feet on the ledge of the litter box and sticking his head out of the front. Like this;
This is the best pic I have ever been able to capture of it.
However, now that his brother has defeated the vent lid to the cat box, earlier today I caught Lazlo pooping in this litter box with his head sticking out of the top hole so he didn’t have to smell what he was making…
The cat’s potty box has this vent with a lid on top (it’s supposed to be for “MORE ODOR CONTROL!”…?) and I’ve been wondering why the vent lid keeps falling off. Then I just witnessed Lou (after taking a poop) ignore the entrance and climb out the top hole so he could sit on the roof.
Like a boss.
Now I know.
Margs is three now (!! I can’t believe it…). Now when she tells me storys/explains basic principles of the world to me, she can do it without just repeating two or three words over and over again.
Margs: I saw a ice sculptures! I saw a ice sculptures, they are at the lake. It’s frozen. I could show you! They’re just at the lake. At my beach! My beach is frozen. I can’t go to my beach, cuz it frozen. My snow is here! Wanna see it? It’s out a window, see? Woah…. that’s a lotta snow! You can’t step in it though. You can’t step in it cuz your foot goes down. Your foot goes down and make a hole. Your foot make a hole and… and your leg get cold.
Margs: (While we were “playing” the board game ‘Trouble’) You won! Nice job! It’s my turn now.”